It was a long day of climbing, with Jacob riding much of the way with the twin of Tyler Hamilton, who was very shy and requested not to have photos of him posted.
He finished 17th, and was greeted at the line by his old flame, Maria Sharapova.
Maria: Jacob, I have returned for you.
Jacob: Maria, we’ve had this discussion before.
Maria: Jacob, I believe we can make things work.
Jacob: I’m sorry Maria, my love lies elsewhere.
Maria: I can change Jacob!
Jacob: Not like this you can’t. You would need to be the pavement in the spring and the dirt and mud in the fall.
Maria: Is the pavement an international tennis star? Does it have enough money where we can retire at the age of 22? Can it cook? Does it have an impressive collection of plates?
Jacob: Huh, how many?
Maria: Three!
Jacob: Well, no. But it does have one thing you don’t, my love.
Maria: Oh, Jacob, come down from your impressively long trackstand and come with me…
Jacob: I’m sorry, Maria, it just wasn’t meant to be.
Jacob ended his impressively long track stand and rode away, past the stormtroopers and through the fields of chocolate, until, he awoke in a cold sweat…
Jacob: Was, was this whole weekend just a bad dream?
Oh, Maria. You could be so much more than filler for my blog...
ReplyDeleteHAHAHAHA Johan, you always make gems.
ReplyDeleteMan I thought the implication of you waking up in your shorts was uh...
ReplyDeleteDifferent.
Than just a bad dream. That was very confusing for two seconds, I didn't think you were that sort of risk-taker with your humor.
That's to say it was a ballsy move.
ReplyDeleteI love this.
ReplyDelete